When Drinking and Thanksgiving Planning Collide

Nov 20, 2012 by


This is what happens when Thanksgiving and 100 proof liquor collide.  To give you a quick little background:

My roommate is a single dad with daughters and an ex wife.  The ex usually claims the kids for Thanksgiving and my friend usually ends up working.  This year he was surprised to find out he’d have three of his daughters over for Thanksgiving.  This is pretty exciting for him as he loves Thanksgiving dinner and never gets to spend it with his girls, so he was pretty amped to take on dinner.

My family, on the other hand, is not as enthusiastic about Thanksgiving Dinner.  Don’t get me wrong, we find plenty to be thankful for, but preparing a huge dinner and trashing every pot, pan and dish in the house is not our big priority, we usually go out for dinner and spend a low key time in which we come home to a clean house.  I brought up the idea of going out instead of cooking in and was vetoed by both the roommate and the wife (so maybe its just ME that’s not enthusiastic about Tgiving dinner), so it looks like Thanksgiving is on, and Doug is in charge.

Normally I try to argue my point a little more than I did this fateful night, but I’d purchased a 1/5th of 100 proof peppermint schnapps on my way home from work and was really more concerned with warming up my insides by a nice warm fire on a cold crappy night.  Fast forward a few hours, and most of the bottle, and Doug is out the door to get more to drink with a promise from me that I’d be awake to party with him when he got home.

I was asleep in bed within 2 minutes of him walking out the door.

The next morning, we found this list on the coffee table.  Apparently, late into the night, Doug decided a list was what he needed to stay on top of Thanksgiving dinner.  One of my favorite things about this list was Doug thinking that me or my wife added things to the list after he wrote it – we did not.


Doug’s Thanksgiving List – Front Page




















Doug’s Thanksgiving List – Back Page








(Click on the above images to see bigger, easier to read versions.)

Other favorite comments:

  • Referring to the Stripper App and good looking mute women  -“I’ve been single for a long time”
  • “I wonder why I wanted pita bread”
  • “It’s nice that I wanted to get consensus on the meat”
  • “I remember writing the part about a group photo, I don’t remember thinking “its a must!”  I guess it was really important to me.”

Moments like these make me thankful for the people in my life – Alison, Austin, Doug, Molly, Felecia, Chelsea and my Mom (Not sure if she’s the mom on the list or not, but regardless…) I’m looking forward to spending Thanksgiving with all of you, even if we don’t end up getting strippers.



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  1. Kelly Green Sowers

    Not sure what the strippers are bringing…but I sure hope it’s the brussel sprout casserole! (And I’d like the recipe please…)

  2. Ali

    I also thought it was sweet that he wanted the cats & dog to have treats. And funny that he indicated there was more on the back, lest we miss anything. Anyway, today’s the day, so you drunk fucks get out of bed & start cooking! Happy Thanksgiving!!

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